Editing Lessons #2

No doubt I will learn many lessons as I revise… so let’s enumerate this as #2.

A Beneficial Replacement

In my novel Vengeance Will Come ‘Abudra’ is both the surname of my protagonist and the region (or country) that he rules.

When I was originally writing it I thought that demonstrated a longevity in the family rule. That however isn’t really true: the reader could just as easily assume the country was renamed when a new ruler took over… as recently as yesterday.

Besides, longevity of rule isn’t really important to the plot line. It does speak a bit to the character of the family, but not enough to make it worthwhile to potentially confuse the reader.

Consequently I am changing the name of the region to ‘Tador’ with a demonym of ‘Tadorians’.

A Mouthful of Humble Pie

Recently I complained about a book with too many exclamation marks.

Imagine my embarrassment when I came across the same thing while editing.

“…Soon it will be time and then I will strike. I will take Danyel’s prized possession… and then he will wither and die! There will be no more Abudra Region! It will collapse as he does, and I will take it!” He roared loudly. The recording ended with the sound of Menas breathing heavily.

Danyel let out a loud burst of laughter, coming deep from within his belly. Trevin smiled widely. There was no telling who had observed Trevin pass Danyel the prompter, and this would introduce doubt as to its contents.

The laughter and smiling subsided with Danyel wiping away tears from his eyes.

“You were right… thank you for that Trevin… …you were wise to let me listen without Jessica, she would not approve of this, but it is very funny… …who would have thought? If only they knew!” Danyel said.

That’s 3 exclamation marks in 143 words. It will be changed dramatically.

In partial defense for myself this is the pre-edit version and was written long before I made my rule of thumb of one exclamation mark per 10k words.

But it’s good to have a piece of humble pie occasionally; it keeps me honest. 🙂

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