Writing Again

In the last week I’ve been doing some writing again (it’s been a while).

I’m revising my novelette, Escape from Hell. A novelette is longer than a short-story, but smaller than a novella (sitting in the 7,500 to 17,500 word count range). Escape from Hell is definitely a personal favourite. It’s a first-person faith-inspired trip into the afterlife. If I remember correctly I wrote it in a very short time frame, the whole story coming together in a few days. That is to say, I felt inspired to write it and the words flowed out of my brain and heart onto the page.

The only point were I slowed were the violent scenes, of which there are a few. It is literally Hell, so it’s not full of Sunday picnics with butterflies and rainbows. It’s a tricky balance to strike though. It’s hell: I want it to be horrific – and yet I don’t want it to be so overwhelming that the reader disengages.

Because of how excited I was by the story I didn’t revise it much… I just put it onto my website to share in a rush of endorphins. (I’ve removed it now, pending publication). So now, with a year or more writing experience behind me, I’m taking another look at it to see how I might revise it.

There is a part of me that wants to significantly expand it, though that will come after much careful deliberation. I’ve thought of a few different places where I could lengthen the story arc – and make it more gripping to read – but it’s balancing that disengage factor. Perhaps I will write the extra story arc and have a few alpha readers test it? (The words after all are not wasted, they count towards the ‘million practice words’ every author needs).

I’m going to be more structured in my revision process this time. I envision a three-pass process. The first revision (which I’m currently in) is looking at the broader story arcs. The second revision I’ll look at the detail, trying to tighten each sentence and the third pass I’ll be hunting for typos etc.

Advertisements

Highlights from ‘A Memory of Light’

The dog didn’t eat my homework, but the browser and/or WordPress sure chewed and swallowed my post 😦 Thankfully I wasn’t finished but it still set me back a long way.

Earlier this year I began to re-read the Wheel of Time tomes. I’d never read the whole series, so I thought it was time. After reading 14 books and a staggering 4.4 million words the journey has ended. This is my final post where I discuss the last book – and share my favourite highlights from A Memory of Light. You can see all of my other reviews here:

This is spoiler-filled.

Writing the final book in this long series was always going to be a hard task. The reading audience is heavily invested and they expect to be rewarded for lasting through the previous 13 books. All the promises have been made and now all that remains is to fit all of the puzzle pieces together. Oh, and in case that isn’t hard enough the majority of the book is a battle. The Last Battle (i.e. it better be epic) where the forces of Light and Darkness clash for the final time. And the change in author (due to Jordan’s death) was always going to increase scrutiny. Certainly it was never going to be easy to write. Additionally the battle had to be stretched out to the length expected of a Wheel of Time book. No pressure, none at all… Brandon Sanderson deserves credit for taking on such a difficult task and doing it so well.

Making the Pieces Fit. I hadn’t considered it before read it, but it made sense that the Last Battle would have to involve time distortion. Even a fictional battle between the ultimate forces of Good and Evil can’t extend for 350k words; fights are intense and tiring; rarely prolonged. Time dilation allows time to crawl infinitely slowly near where Rand fights the Dark One (and his mini-boss) and it moves in days (or weeks) the further away. This allows the cast of lesser-heroes and villains to get in on the action. It means the battle can be more nuanced that a choreographed fight scene.

Keeping the tension up in such a book would be challenging. Jordan has set the context of the novels and it’s a different tone to George RR Martin. Readers going in can be confident that Rand will win the Last Battle. And further, they can be confident that the cost of that victory isn’t going to be too high. The victory would come (potentially) with some losses but not the obliteration that would be almost expected had Martin written the series.

Plot Twists are a very Delicate Balance. A very delicate balance. A successful plot twist is surprising yet inevitable. The reader has to be surprised by a plot twist, but then with the benefit of hindsight see that there have been hints along the way and this is the logical outcome.

One of these which worked excellently for me, was the genius of Matt and the Horn of Valere. Early on in the series Matt blows the Horn and summons up the ghostly apparitions of heroes to push back the Seanchan army. Everyone knows that in doing so he is linked to the Horn until death. The heroes will only come at his horn blow. He’s also recounted many times that he died or near-died (I think both are used) when he was hung from the tree and saved by Rand. And though he tells us he’s died because he’s alive and well I hadn’t connected the two. And so as the Last Battle rages and the forces of Evil are winning with the Horn on the wrong side of the battlefield I had no idea how Matt was going to get to it. It turns out, he didn’t need to. Genius.

I didn’t see the connection between the events. Undoubtedly others did. To say it another way, the plot twist worked for me. One that didn’t work for me (at all) were the Sharans.

As the Last Battle is progressing the Sharan army appear through a Gateway from a distant land and surprise the forces of Light by joining the Dark side. A vast army with a lot of male and female wielders of the One Power, they are a counter-balance against the White Tower and Seanchan channelers. (The Black Tower is split down the middle).

The Sharans have scattered mentions throughout the books, often by alternate names. And the Forsaken, Demandred, was mentioned to have been notably absent a lot, as in “what’s he doing?”. They were referenced so infrequently that I had assumed they were referenced to expand the world. I thought it was Jordan pointing at shadows to assure the reader the world was deeper and broader than that which the reader had seen. I didn’t think they were important, and honestly, had largely forgotten about them.

In the later book they were given a greater prominence but coming so late in the series the sections felt clunky. I assumed that Jordan was pulling a ‘Tom Bombadil‘: letting his imaginative expression override his this-fits internal editor. I actually found the sections annoying because they were taking me out of the story.

So when the Sharan appear in the Last Battle, it didn’t click for me. I didn’t think it a brilliant plot twist; more of a deus ex machina to help balance the Dark side of the forces. That might be harsh but the plot twist didn’t work for me.

Speaking of deus ex machina: the new form of Travelling using the True Power. I suspect it was added so that the enemy could zip in-and-away constantly.

I did like the fact that the Great Captain’s were all corrupted (or at least taken off the playing field). Though it doesn’t rise to the level of a plot twist, it was a clever plot turn. Here is this resource that we expect the side of the Light to have, and yet in one foul swoop it is taken away.

The ending… it didn’t really leave me feeling satisfied. I think I would have preferred if Rand had died in a final heroic act.

Onto my highlights:

  • The approaching refugees would soon discover that they’d been marching toward danger. It was not surprising. Danger was in all directions. The only way to avoid walking toward it would be to stand still. (Page 70)
  • The bored soldier there had a face like an old shovel—it was half-covered in dirt and would be better off locked in a shed somewhere. (Page 261)
  •  He did not go into the Rahad. The place looked different, now. There were soldiers camped outside it. Generations of successive rulers in Ebou Dar had allowed the Rahad to fester unchecked, but the Seanchan were not so inclined. Mat wished them luck. The Rahad had fought off every invasion so far. Light. Rand should have just hidden there, instead of going up to fight the Last Battle. The Trollocs and Darkfriends would have come for him, and the Rahad would have left them all unconscious in an alley, their pockets turned inside out and their shoes sold for soup money. (Page 262)
  •  “Being in charge isn’t always about telling people what to do. Sometimes, it’s about knowing when to step out of the way of people who know what they’re doing.” (Page 295)
  •  The entire land wilted faster than a boy at Bel Tine with no dancing partners. (Page 336)

 And some more funny one-upmanship between Rand and Matt.

Rand: “What did you do to your eye?”
Matt: “A little accident with a corkscrew and thirteen angry innkeepers. The hand?”
“Lost it capturing one of the Forsaken.”
“Capturing?” Mat said. “You’re growing soft.”
Rand snorted. “Tell me you’ve done better.”
“I killed a gholam,” Mat said.
“I freed Illian from Sammael.”
“I married the Empress of the Seanchan.”
“Mat,” Rand said, “are you really trying to get into a bragging contest with the Dragon Reborn?” He paused for a moment. “Besides, I cleansed saidin. I win.”
“Ah, that’s not really worth much,” Mat said.
“Not worth much? It’s the single most important event to happen since the Breaking.”
“Bah. You and your Asha’man are already crazy,” Mat said, “so what does it matter?” He glanced to the side. “You look nice, by the way. You’ve been taking better care of yourself lately.”

“Sure,” Mat said. “By the way, I saved Moiraine. Chew on that as you try to decide which of the two of us is winning.” Mat followed Tuon, and behind him rose the laughter of the Dragon Reborn. (Page 368)

It seems late to make the decision, but I think I like Matt’s point-of-views best. He has more of a cheeky disposition which is fun to read:

  • Her new clothing looked very nice on her … Min’s was a dark green shiny silk with black embroidery and wide, open sleeves that were at least long enough to stick your head into. They had done up her hair, too, sticking bits of metal into it, silver with inset firedrops. There were hundreds of them. If this whole Doomseer title did not work out for her, perhaps she could find work as a chandelier. (Page 544) 
  • “Please, if I might make a humble suggestion, Highness? You are unprotected; let me at least give you some proper armor.” Mat thought for a moment, then agreed that her suggestion was a prudent one. A person could get hurt out there, what with arrows flying and blades swinging. Tylee called over one of her senior officers who seemed to be about the same size as Mat. She had the man remove his armor, which was extremely colorful, overlapping plates lacquered green, gold and red, outlined with silver. The officer looked bemused when Mat handed him his coat in trade, saying that he expected it to be returned at the end of the day in the same condition. (Page 558)
  • If you do not learn from your losses, you will be ruled by them. (Page 425) 

This below quote is worth a mention. A murderer standing over you is scary. One who is thoughtfully considering an everyday thing about you takes it further.

  • Still, bedding down here was like trying to sleep while a murderer stood beside your bed, holding a knife and contemplating the color of your hair. (Page 629)
  •  “Thank you.” She glanced at the sword.
  • “I’m a Warder now.” He shrugged. “Might as well look like one, eh?” He could cut a Trolloc in half with a gateway at three hundred paces, and summon fire from inside Dragonmount itself, and he still wanted to carry a sword. It was, she decided, a male thing. (Page 697)
  •  Some men would call it brash, foolhardy, suicidal. The world was rarely changed by men who were unwilling to try being at least one of the three. (Page 885)  
  • Below, the battle churned like a meat grinder, ripping men and Trollocs into chunks of dead flesh. (Page 950)

 And just a couple of interesting words:

  • starveling (Page 70)
  • occluded (Page 477)

Thus ended the Wheel of Time. If you’ve read it, I’d be curious to hear how you felt about the ending?

Highlights from ‘Towers of Midnight’

This is my penultimate Wheel of Time series highlights post, where I pull out my favourite lines and reflect on some of the themes or writing style that I observed.

I read through book 13 of the Wheel of Time with a near insatiable hunger. I normally read on my daily commute but also found myself reading in every spare minute I had (including, when I should have been doing other things). I read with great anticipation. It felt as though I had journeyed so long through the series, and the end of the journey was in sight. For twelve long books the story has been reaching slowly toward a climax and now I knew it was just around the corner. The prophecies would be fulfilled, the Last Battle would finally come. With anticipation (and a tinge of sadness) I looked forward to finishing the journey with the myriad of characters who I’ve spent the more than half a year with.

There were two other things I particularly liked about this book (especially now that I consider them in hindsight). I’ll be a little vague so as not to spoil it. The first is the treatment of the character of Noal Charin. This elderly – and yet surprisingly spritely and dangerous – senior citizen first appears in book 7. He pops in and out for a while, until he begins traveling with Matt. Noal is very suspicious and we’re used to seeing assassins and Darkfriends hiding in plain-sight, so it’s no surprise that the reader assumes he’s somehow nefarious. Not until Towers of Midnight do we understand who he really is. He has a secret, only it’s not the one we think it is. At least that’s how I felt.

The second is the fulfilment of the prophecy where Matt would have to trade “half the light of the world” to rescue Moiraine. I always wondered what that meant, and how it would be achieved. Now I know, and it was excellently plotted. And of course, finished off with some trademark-quality Matt irreverence:

Mat stepped back and tipped his hat to the creatures. ‘Looks like the game can be won after all,’ he said. ‘Tell the foxes I’m mighty pleased with this key they gave me. Also, you can all go rot in a flaming pit of fire and ashes, you unwashed lumps on a pig’s backside. Have a grand bloody day.’ (page 897).

Now onto my highlights:

Dull green moss hung from the branches, drooping like shreds of flesh from rotting corpses. (Page 22)

I love some good descriptive phrases; words that really paint a picture that flourishes in the imagination. What’s particularly great about this one is more than just the vivid description: the phrase reinforces the theme and setting. One wouldn’t use a description like this to describe trees at a wedding, but trees in a world that is literally ‘spoiling’ fit it perfectly.

Like an old friend. A dear, beloved old friend that you were going to stab through the eye, open up at the gut and consume by handfuls while drinking his blood. That was the property way to treat friends. (Page 36)

This block starts off one way, making you think about a friend; and then pivots 180 degrees to show that it’s actually the opposite. (It is a terrible block. For context: it’s an evil villain who has been entirely corrupted by darkness. The thought-process also reveals the character’s warped madness. At the time I didn’t really understand this passage. Only now with hindsight – having finished book 14 – do I understand it. I guess it was foreshadowing and my memory may be foggy – perhaps it does play a bigger part in book 14?)

Continuing the theme I’ve mentioned before about a character understanding and relating to what they are familiar with: Faile comes from a culture noted for their cavalry and adeptness with horse bows.

Faile was actually a perfect complement to Perrin. Where he was a blunt and leveled lance at charge, she was a subtle cavalry bow. (Page 123)

And, Androl a master craftsman who worked with leather:

Logain was a hard man, broken around the edges, like an old scabbard that hadn’t been properly lacquered. But that scabbard still held a deadly sword. Logain was honest. A good man, beneath the scuff marks. (Page 746)

Also, taking what is a cliche for us, and bending and twisting until it’s different enough so as not to be boring. ‘A face only a mother would love’ becomes “Berg had a face ugly enough to make his own mother wince.” (Page 149) and the ‘long arm of the law’ becomes

There were many who would think to exploit a lone wanderer at night, particularly outside the city walls, where the arm of the law was a little on the flabby side. (Page 377)

Some gender-based humour, where men and women looked askance at one another:

  • She was not there at the wagon, fortunately for Mat. She would complain at him again for not having gotten her a bellfounder. She seemed to think him her own personal messenger boy. An unruly one, who refused to do his job properly. Most women had moments like that. (Page 259)
  • there was nothing a woman liked better than finding men who were relaxing, then giving them orders. (Page 266)
  • Nothing was more dangerous for the sanity of men than a woman with too much time on her hands. (Page 266)

‘Nobody walks a difficult path without stumbling now and again. It didn’t break you when you fell. That’s the important part.’ (Page 208)

Besides, I can only fight in one place at a time. What is coming will be grander than that, grander and more terrible than any one man could hope to hold back. I will organize you, but I must leave you. The war will be yours.’ (Page 554)

This passage explains what we should expect in the final book. Rand will face the Dark One, but the cosmic battle between good and evil will not be the only battle. The forces of darkness are many, and the full cast of characters will be used to hold-back the enemy.

Truth, veiled in fiction:

  • But also because it was for the best. If two bards tried to play different songs at the same time, they both made noise. But if one stepped back to give harmony to the other’s melody, then the beauty could be greater than either made alone. (Page 626)
  • The men who don’t want titles should be the ones who get them, it seems. (Page 681)
  • Small things were important. Seconds were small things, and if you heaped enough of those on top of one another, they became a man’s life. (Page 746)

Some great repartee:

‘I don’t like this,’ Birgitte said.
‘You don’t like anything, lately,’ Elayne said.
‘I swear, you’re becoming more irritable by the day.’‘It’s because you’re becoming more foolhardy by the day.’
‘Oh, come now. This is hardly the most foolhardy thing I’ve done.’
‘Only because you’ve set a very high benchmark for yourself, Elayne.’ (Page 833)

And

Mat just shook his head. ‘Well, we’re out, one way or another. But Thom, next time I want to do the bloody negotiating, sneak up behind and hit me on the head with something large, heavy and blunt. Then take over.’

‘Your request is noted.’ (Page 907)

Just great phrases:

  • Eventually, the wind encountered another continent, this one quiet, like a man holding his breath before the headsman’s axe fell. (Page 46)
  • He was a young man, but the way he stood – relaxed, yet poised, hand on the pommel of his sword – indicated he was a practiced soldier. Too bad he had such a pretty face. A life in the military would probably end up wrecking that. (Page 303)
  • at night, the holes and scars on the White Tower were patched with a bandage of darkness. (Page 361)

Some interesting words that I’d either not heard before, or seldom:

  • whelp – A young offspring of a mammal, such as a dog or wolf. (Page 85)
  • succor – To give assistance to in time of want, difficulty, or distress (Page 95)
  • expurgations – purging, cleansing from anything noxious, offensive, sinful or erroneous (Page 316)
  • fecund – Capable of producing offspring or vegetation (Page 429)
  • bittern – a type of wading bird (Page 721)
  • superlatively – Of the highest order, quality, or degree; surpassing or superior to all others. (Page 784)
  • sonorous – Having or producing a full, deep, or rich sound (Page 895)

Nerd-Author Fun v2: Text Analysis

I promised this week that my blog post would be about some of my C# coding, which also happens to dovetail in beautifully with my writing. I’ve taken my earlier work and begun the super-charging process. That being said: this is just the beginning. In the future I plan to make it available, far more powerful and with a few of the bugs ironed out.

The general premise behind the program is that it can load your story from a text file, and then allow you to analyse it. At the moment it is sans-UI – which means it doesn’t have pretty user windows, checkboxes and other controls. I’m calling it Text Analysis Command Line (TAC). As it’s a command line program you have to type commands in to operate it.

So what can it do?

Like any good program it contains help – typing ‘?’ will give you a list and basic description of the available commands; typing ‘<command> ?’ will give you detailed options on that particular command.

wordcount-1

When you see a pipe symbol ‘|’ it means or. Square brackets (‘[‘, ‘]’) mean optional.

Most commands can either display output on the screen or save the results to a file. If using a single greater-than symbol (‘>’) the file will be saved (unless it already exists). Using the double option ‘>>’ will save the file, overwriting it if necessary.

Below is a description of all of the currently available commands. The results are based on processing Vengeance Will Come, my scifi/fantasy adventure (available now):

wordcount. You can display the frequency of every word used. Earlier in the year I bought Scrivener (left). For the most part it’s a great program but I was disappointed there was no way to export (or even easily query) word count data. The image of TAC (right) shows a snippet of both the textual version (default) and the ‘basic mode’ (using -b option). The basic mode is valuable if opening the file in Excel to do pretty graphs.

wordcount can also provide wordcount-word lengththe number of words which begin with given letters (-f) or the length of words (-l).

Just in case you’re curious the longest word at 20 characters is ‘uncharacteristically’. The three 16’s are: ‘conspiratorially’, ‘incontrovertible’ and ‘responsibilities’.

For the purpose of completeness, I’ll briefly mention the data command. At the moment it’s limited, a means to interrogate the data. In order to do all of this (and future) processing I painstakingly categorise every character of text into a type. Using the -expseg option outputs this information.

datacmd-2
-expseg option

 

At this stage the only two other data commands are -sen (output sentence). For example outputting the sentence at segment 128 is:

At first light they invade my mind, besieging it to the point of exhaustion.

And -block (output block) at 128:

“I wish that I didn’t know the future; that I couldn’t see the prophecies unfold before me. At first light they invade my mind, besieging it to the point of exhaustion. Even in my fitful sleep they haunt me as wild animals stalk the scent of blood, turning what little rest I get into an extension of my waking nightmare. I cannot escape.

The find command is powerful and will be leveraged heavily in future updates.

find-1

Unsurprisingly, find locates the occurrences of a specified word. Importantly the before and after options allow displaying the word in a variable level of context (e.g. want to see 10 words preceding the word, or only 5?).

find can also locate every instance of a specified type of punctuation. Want to know how often I use exclamation marks? Typing ‘find -p’ brings up a list of punctuation options from which a selection can be made.

find-2

The answer is of course 45 (as displayed on the screenshot). However, now I know exactly where they are (and in what context).

find-3.PNG
The first use of ! occurs at the 660th character in my novel.

I’m a big believer in not over-using the exclamation mark, so a tool like this would let me easily see how often I’ve used it in a given book (and calculate the amount of text between each usage). More importantly, it can also let me track down when I’ve used a ” instead of a “ which seems to happen no matter how careful I am.

This brings me to the end of the tour of TAC v0.0.1, I hope you liked it.

Highlights from ‘Knife of Dreams’

In blogging about my own book, Vengeance Will Come, I got a little behind in sharing my highlights as I read through the Wheel of Time series. Getting back on track here are my thoughts and comments on Book 11, Knife Of Dreams.

One of the things which I have commented on several times – because it is worthy of repetition is how Robert Jordan explores the differences between the genders. It seems that confusion and the up-is-down way that men and women think and act toward one another are endless fodder for jokes and character tension. (And much of it based in some truth).

  • only a fool thought he knew what was in a woman’s head just because she had a smile on her face. (Page 229)
  • Women could compress a great deal into one look. (Page 233)
  • When a woman went silent on you, there usually was trouble in the offing (Page 280)
  • A man wanted to stand well in his wife’s eyes. (Page 438)
  • “We’ll talk about it,” she murmured, the bond filling with stubborn resolve. The most dire words a woman can say short of “I’m going to kill you,” Rand thought. (Page 460)
  • She stood there giving him one of those looks women carried in their belt pouches. (Page 487)
  • …Caraline paused her talk with Min to give him a look that would have had him hunting for the stab wound had he noticed it. (Page 494)
  • “Still, a cold bath helps a man keep his mind off his troubles.”“I thought that was for keeping your mind off women,” Perrin said. He was in no mood for joking, but he could not expect everyone to be as grim as he was. Elyas laughed. “What else causes a man’s troubles?” He disappeared into the water, and Tallanvor replaced him. (Page 617)

There have been a few points throughout the series where Jordan’s writing has elicited an emotional response from me. It’s impressive to consider that even though I know something is pure fiction, it can still register an emotional response of sadness or elation. (In much the same ways as animation can). One such scene is where Nynaeve tricks her husband Lan, by depositing him as far away from his dangerous goal as she could (while still keeping her word), and then Travels (ala teleports) to every village along his route, calling for soldiers to join him.

“My name is Nynaeve ti al’Meara Mandragoran. The message I want sent is this. My husband rides from World’s End toward Tarwin’s Gap, toward Tarmon Gai’don. Will he ride alone?” (Page 472)

The Wheel of Time is undeniably an EPIC fantasy. The world is populated by numerous cultures; each with their own customs, fashion and architecture. Not to mention biases against each-other. Oops, I guess I did mention it.

Commoners in these lands seemed to believe themselves equal to everyone. Selucia gave the same sort of instructions to the lanky young man who took …[her horse]…  The young man stared at Selucia’s chest, until she slapped him. Hard. He only grinned and led the dun away rubbing his cheek. Tuon sighed. That was all very well for Selucia, but for herself, striking a commoner would lower her eyes for months. (Page 609)

For us in the West, a woman slapping a rude man would be (fairly) appropriate. The idea though that it would result in shame for the woman is so contradictory. It adds a flavour to the story; a richness and a difference to the culture. Jordan turns our social norms on their head: women are often more respected than men, blond-hair and Caucasian skin seem to be rare.

Being an epic fantasy, the series is full of prophecy which is used as a foretaste of what is to come, and then as a reward when it is paid off (especially when in a surprising way). However, prophecy isn’t always fulfilled with a trumpet sounding and a big climax – sometimes it occurs out of happenstance:

The ring was a carver’s try-piece, bought only because it stuck on his finger; he would give up those memories of Hawkwing’s face along with every other old memory, if it would get the bloody snakes out of his head; and yet those things had gained him a wife. The Band of the Red Hand would never have existed without those old memories of battles. (Page 809)

It never hurts to throw in a little bit of superstition or a lack of understanding. Characters after all, aren’t all-knowing.

His companion waved a plump, dismissive hand even while staring at the Maidens. “Worms?” he said absently. “Everybody knows silk grows on trees.” Walking deeper into the common room, Rand shook his head as the proprietor advanced to meet him. Worms! The tales people could come up with to try prying coin out of somebody else. (Page 483)

And just some good quotes:

  • flattery oiled the insignificant as well as it did the mighty. (Page 72)
  • yet the biting, sulphurous smell that filled the chill night air seemed an ill omen, and hardened men offered their prayers aloud as fervently as the beardless boys. (Page 98)
  • Birgitte was the first to arrive, the bond filled with weary discontent. “A ride?” she said, and when Elayne explained, she began raising objections. Well, some of it was objections; the rest was just insults. “What hare-brained, crack-pated scheme are you talking about, Birgitte?” (Page 733)

And a great quote to remember when plotting stories:

It was never this way in stories. In stories, everything was always wrapped up neatly by the end. Real life was much . . . messier. (Page 798)

And the list of words which I either didn’t know, or don’t use enough. Whilst I do love good words, and enjoy being educated by what I read, personally – I would hesitate to use so many “big words” in my own writing. Granted, they are few among thousands… still, I would hesitate.

  • hale (Page 9)
  • salubrious (Page 90)
  • tincture (Page 91)
  • zephyr (Page 97)
  • androgynous (Page 142)
  • griddle (Page 217)
  • derrick (Page 220)
  • coppiced (Page 307)
  • desiccated (Page 309)
  • perquisite (Page 400)
  • andirons (Page 414)
  • demure (Page 434)
  • gobbet (Page 449)
  • charnel (Page 450)
  • detritus (Page 567)
  • susurration (Page 581)
  • grouse (Page 590)
  • suet (Page 596)
  • asperity (Page 638)
  • ebullience (Page 729)
  • vituperative (Page 787)
  • visages (Page 791)

Writing: The Passing of Time

sundial-3692590_640One of the tricks to master in writing is how to show the passage of time in a story. For example if Chapter 2 occurs two weeks after Chapter 1, how do you show that? It’s one area I’m still honing in my writing.

I first highlighted these lines in book 11 of the Wheel of Time series:

“…the sun more than halfway to the horizon, by the time he saw what he was looking for.” (Page 151)

“In a morning ritual, his fingers made another knot mechanically, then slid down the cord, counting. Twenty-two knots. Twenty-two mornings since Faile was kidnapped.” (Page 156)

The first obviously makes use of the position of the sun, and the second describes in a clever action-oriented manner the time that has passed. I decided to exclude these two quotes from my upcoming highlights post, because I wanted to examine the topic further.

Of course the crudest way to show time is simply to tell the reader “10 days later…” I’ll admit earlier drafts of Vengeance Will Come had this a lot. There were two reasons for this: I didn’t know any better  and I was also using the prompts to aid my own keeping track of time. It is a crude approach which pulls the reader out of the story. There are still a few instances of itin the book, but it’s something I use rarely now.

A better way, as the old adage goes, is to show the reader instead of telling them. The goal, I think, should be to show the passage of time through the setting and/or character.

Here are some of the ideas I brainstormed. If you have any other ideas, please add them in a comment below.timescale

 

 

Now Published: Vengeance Will Come

Earlier this week, I published Vengeance Will Come on Amazon. You can read it now for the low price of $1.50 (US) or $2.12 (AU).

cover-1

After oscillating more than a conviction-less politician with contradictory poll information on if I should publish and how I should publish I finally just did it. I wrote Vengeance Will Come hoping that others would find it an entertaining read – and that wasn’t going to happen if I didn’t put it out into the public sphere.

At the moment it is just an e-book, though I’ve had a few requests for a print book – so I will look into the implications of that in the future.

This is the description on the Amazon page to whet the reading appetite.

‘A man in a fight for survival will grasp at anything to use as a weapon.’

A shadowy cult with arcane powers foments hostilities between two Regents, locking them in a bitter struggle that traverses planets.

Regent Menas Senay has been promised the long-awaited revenge that will free him from the demons of his past. He’s willing to pay anything to achieve it, even if it costs him everything.

When Menas attacks the Tador capital he unleashes a series of events that rock Regent Danyel Abudra’s life to its foundations. Danyel soon discovers that even rulers are slaves in adverse circumstances, and that to prevail will be harder than he can conceive.

But they’d both better hope the cult doesn’t get what it wants from the deal.

Vengeance costs more than anyone expects, and it’s coming…

At just over 100,000 words and 297 pages this book is approximately 20% longer since my last revision cycle, and 15% shorter than the original draft. (I’ll talk more about the revision process in future posts).

Thanks and credit for the background image on the cover must go to the talented user Gellinger who uploaded and made it available for use at pixabay.

landscape-2806202_1920

Seeing Vengeance Will Come finally available for others to read is a great encouragement to keep writing!